Saturn, oh Saturn, you are my special friend. You have pestered me endlessly my whole life, and your lessons are merciless. There is no reward before the very end. Before all the work has been done to your liking. Currently you are blocking my way forward and will do so for the next nine months. Time enough to pause and look what you have to say. You won´t let me pass anyway.

Again – astrological themes rarely show up single-threaded. They rather present as an artful interwoven display. I do not only have Saturn accentuated in my own chart, I also attract people who either have a tight Saturn-north node conjunction or have their Saturn sit on my node.

But what do those two represent?

Saturn has many faces. He is for one the grumpy old guy, happy in his solitude. But he is also the police officer, the border guard, the teacher, mentor, the one who rules and makes the laws. Saturn is associated with time, and his main quality is restriction and slowing down.

Our north node, on the other hand, is considered one of the most important points in our chart. It points us into the direction of our destiny. At the north node, we can fulfill our highest soul expression once we have learned our lessons.

Saturn lessons

I also remember the moment when I stepped out of the shade of an important mentor of mine. What a liberation! She had been an important guide most of my life, but the moment I reached her level, she became a roadblock. I had to step out of her shade. I had to become my own Saturn, follow my own guidance.

This is one way a Saturn connection can go. The other is simply a reverse. If you have felt blocked by Saturn for most of your life, in the end you will be rewarded and might become a teacher for others. If you have done all the work.

Another friend has Saturn sitting on her north node in her natal chart. This kind of intimate encounter is called a conjunction. What is it about? Clearly, she is meant to be a teacher, a role model and guide for others. Did it come easily to her? I don´t think so.

Uncomfortable and yet rewarding

I also happened to meet people whose Saturn is dead conjunct my north node. Guess what. They make me uncomfortable. Heavy. I lose my lightness. I feel a resistance being around them. And yet they are able to teach me stuff.

And then there was this horse who had Saturn on her north node. For years, she was living with another, very old horse that had a hard time dying (again, Saturn slows everything). Once it did, she kicked down fences and had her own personal liberation. Her way into the future was free.

Currently I feel a very – strong – slowing – down. Down to a hard stop. For me as a vivid and curious Gemini this genuinely feels like torture. But when I look at my chart I can see why that is. Saturn is currently retrograding (seemingly moving backward) near my north node, my Mars (willpower and activity) and my Vesta (my holy inner flame). It will take nine nerve wrecking months until he finally hits my north node, and the transiting north node in the sky will hit my natal Saturn as well. Exact.

Double hard stop.

I simply, truly hate it.

Sit – Pause – Reflect

But why should I have the astrology if I wasn´t willing to listen to its message? A double Saturn-north node conjunction is a massive, giant STOP SIGN.

Time to slow down, pause and think. Where is it that I really want to go? In what environment? Under whose reign? Which responsibilites do I still have to embrace fully, and which ones I can happily let go of because I have been overcommitted?

Saturn-north node asks for self mastery. Saturn´s happiest place is Capricorn and the goat doesn´t stop half way. It wants to go to the very top and be the very best version of itself.

If there is one big annoyance in my life, it is Saturn. And I am learning why every day. But where there is resistance, there is pain. So instead of rejecting outer rules and orders, I am asked to take full responsibility for myself. Make my own rules. Construct my own little world. And develop into a fully sovereign being.